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How to stay married for 60 years
Theresa Seraphim
for Spotlight
Adolph and Mary Huculak have seen many changes over the past 60 years.
But one thing that hasn’t changed is the love that led them to exchange vows in the rectory of St. Alphonsus Catholic Church in Edmonton on Feb.11, 1950.
“It happened to be a Saturday and was close to Valentine’s Day,” Adolph said in explaining why that day was chosen.
It was also a pre-Lenten date which, in those days, was important for those marrying in a Catholic context. And, because Mary was non-Catholic, the wedding could not take place in the church, which is why the Huculaks had their ceremony in the rectory.
“We came from two different cultures,” said Mary, who is English by ancestry while Adolph is Polish.
The wedding capped off a romance which began in 1947 when Mary moved to Lamont to attend nursing school and Adolph was a musician.
“They got together to practice and four or six nurses went down to listen to them,” said Mary.
For her, seeing Adolph was love at first sight.
“I told my nurse friend, ‘That’s the guy I’m going to marry.’”
Shortly after, the group figured out when the musicians went bowling.
“We just happened to walk into the bowling alley and the rest is history,” said Mary.
Since visitors of the opposite sex weren’t allowed in the nursing school after the doors were locked at 10 p.m., Adolph used to sneak into the hospital to see Mary during her night shifts and leave by sliding down the fire escape.
The Huculaks came to Kinuso on June 6, 1951.
“My Dad picked up some land for us,” said Adolph. “We had to brush our way in (and) had a trailer behind the car.”
“We had two dollars and fifty cents,” Mary added.
The pair had a cow and ended up with chickens, providing them with meat and eggs. A neighbour gave them a patch of land for growing a garden.
“That first winter, I can tell you, I knew every way to make a potato,” said Mary.
The roads weren’t paved, a person had to walk into Kinuso to make a phone call, there was no power (or water, gas or phone) and people often stayed around home from October until springtime.
On the other hand, they had no bills, and five cents could buy a stamp for a letter. With no television or computers at that time, people visited neighbours or played games together at house parties.
The Huculaks are adamant the situation wasn’t a hardship, because everyone else lived the same way, and the circumstances brought their family (they ended up having seven children) together.
Today, the Huculaks also have 15 grandchildren and 18 great- grandchildren.
Adolph said there is no secret for staying married a long time.
“You have to have a good wife, good mother and it helps if she (the wife) has a good husband,” he said.
“The most important thing is that you have faith in God to carry you through,” added Mary.
For her, there is one key to a long marriage.
“It’s communication – and a patient husband.”
Adolph agreed.
“If you both take turns having a fight, it’s OK. But if you both have a fight (it’s not so good),” he laughed.
On a serious note, Mary said she and Adolph never shut each other out.
“We never had the silent treatment.”
Besides marriage, child rearing has also changed over the years, the Huculaks say.
“The temptations for kids now – what’s out there is so much different,” said Adolph.
“I think it’s more stressful for the parents because not everybody’s getting a big salary,” added Mary.
“Families need to be families. You have to give quality time to your kids.”
The Huculaks’ children also never knew about boredom, because any of them complaining about it would be given something to do.
“That word (boredom) wasn’t known in their day,” said Adolph.
Both said they are grateful for friends who have helped them through many a situation.
“We still have a purpose in life,” Mary commented.
“Everything you go through, you come out stronger the other side.”
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Adolph and Mary Huchulak of Kinuso are this year's Valentine's Sweethearts. They have been together for 60 blissfull years, and are still going strong. Featured above is a picture of their wedding day.
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Adolph and Mary Huculak, celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary Feb. 11, say good communication is key to a long, successful marriage.
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