The Page – January 10, 2024

Ever hear about David Tepper?
He is an American billionaire and owner of the Carolina Panthers of the NFL. Last week, he became a little miffed and tossed a drink at a Jacksonville Jaguar fan after his quarterback tossed an interception. No word on what type of drink it was.
The NFL swooped in and fined Tepper $300,000! That’s a lot of drinks!
But don’t worry about starting a GoFundMe page for Tepper. He is worth about $20.6 billion. To equate the fine to his net worth, Tepper could pay the fine 68,667 times!
Wouldn’t it be cheaper to just turn the other cheek, Dave? Kick the garbage can? Yell at the dog?

See all the sad kids and teens around? Yes, the holiday break is over and the “Little Darlings” (that’s what The Page’s college instructor called the students) are back in school!
Tennessee mom Katlyn Whittenburg viral TikTok tells us some excuses why children are late for school. Enjoy!
“Unfit for human interaction!”
“We washed his shoes last night and my husband put them in the oven to dry. The next morning, I turned on the oven for biscuits and melted my son’s shoes!”
“Mom stopped by Starbucks!”
“Her dress didn’t twirl enough!”
“Her dress wasn’t purple enough!”
“Pickles Junior (her imaginary cat) was hiding!”
“My mom just couldn’t,” said a girl, 6, when her mother was eight months pregnant.
The Page’s excuse was a bad case of scolionophobia!
Look it up!

Well, that makes two!
Two members of South Peace News who tried to control the pet population in the last year or so.
One employee (our editor) smacked a deer on the way to Falher late last year. Lots of damage to the truck and the deer didn’t make it. Last week, another incident between High Prairie and Joussard. Not as severe, however.
It’s not like we’re trying to control the pet population as game show host Bob Barker would say. We cannot understand why these animals seem to have a suicide wish.
All kidding aside, be careful out there, drivers! Lots of animals displaced due to last year’s wildfires.

Christmas has come and gone and The Page figures Santa could have been a little nicer!
Perhaps it is time for a younger man to take over the job? Or perhaps lack of competition had make Santa bit complacent?
Always hope for next year! The Page just wishes for a muli-millionaire wife with a Top 10 model figure who owns a chain of liquor stores.
Really! How hard is that, Santa?

In the next week or so the big land sale in High Prairie should be occurring. According to rumour, the deadline for the offer to the potential buyer to buy the old hospital land is nearing a deadline.
This could be a fabulous event for High Prairie. The owner could have big plans to address needs in the community.
Stay tuned!
We’re all on pins and needles!
Meanwhile, Barry Sharkawa’s bid was refused. He wrote a letter to the paper in the Dec. 20 issue, and it quickly shot up to the “most read” stories list.
Geez, everything Barry does interests people!

Sure hope it snows soon for all the Ski-Doo dealers and ski hill operators!
On the brighter side, no snowball fights reported at local schools!
The Page feels badly for the winter sports enthusiasts.

Have a great week!

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